relevance.

you described yourself to me
hollowing out of heart
honey
you told me you would remember the days
each sound you made would resemble the echo of an inclined hardening
harder still you make me wonder
how it is man differs so much from the view of a woman
and you were the boy
who wanted to hold my love in the cusp of two hands quivering
every night if i could see thru the eyes of a sunken view
the water would buckle against the earth
and i would grow you out of roots five years longer
long enough to see the sun stretch against my naked skin
late enough in the morning to see still that you were lingering
ive grown up inside long rows of agricultural indifferences
you said everything you could say
but could not be
and the rows still grow longer
it was the point i said id take
but always knew would never hold solid when
the water no longer takes claim to sides
when life continually asks us to let go of everything that wants to hold us
the runoff remains brutally uneven with honesty.
i’ll describe myself to you
but your patience will abstract
and forget to follow
you are everything i said you were and all the more of what you know already
i am the pieces pulled together in darkness created by light
we were never meant to say all of what was spoken
but life lives with no room to take back or deny
you are the journey of your own dreaming
i am the face you wanted to stake claim
neither will keep vivid towards the ending
of your silence and my relevant withdrawal

searching for the one eyed jesus.

he said he wanted curtains
to live where the light seeped through
but it was already morning against bare window pane
along with the bareness of her skin exposed
she could no longer count the lines that defined her palms
her will lay on a towel
curled beneath the bed
and what if she could complain
tell the sky
and weep like rain
consideration is always considered
but couldn’t the fall free an explanation
never mind the heat of conversation
desert lines up to meet the water
he lined up to meet the words
un-curtained from the threat
his touch cant describe
the neck line
and this is what he gave her
light and morning and skin
and this is all he would give her
she wouldn’t ask for more
couldn’t
because breaking down the moment
that should be taken back
lived too far down the road in front of her
and speaking truth seeped between the night and the day
and breathed in neither
she adjusted herself to trust in occurrence
as he sat
between silence
and agitation gone unseen
mistaking anothers heart beat
for the rhythm of his own
im telling you now
you missed your one eyed jesus

november second.

im reaching towards the past for you
trying to read between lines that hold you pivitol
i asked you how you lived
your life before you knew me
although i didn’t care to know of time and space and listless seasons
the way they know and cling to history
not with you
not that way
because now is something different then before
and this i’ll say with confidence
this is how i’ll ask you
to knot the world
tie the strings of lovers to the anchor of a boat you’ve already sailed out to sea
and if i was your lady
would you be my mister
in the sailors water of ocean blue
spread like honey between wet and board and you
lay in curls of each other
folds of sweat and scruff and smell
the coffee didn’t hold the heat
the morning effected the light
and then you were going
i know all about it
straighten out the right and wrong
but not right now
in the silence of lips and lust and lacked love
you wanted to drive up the 80 where the borders reach the chaos
in quite reasoning
i’ll recollect all the hours
minutes given minute detail in the corners of my mind
to give three days more length
of time spent with you
and how do I live the day towards all the other days
be here in a moment you say
drink your orange juice
finish your breakfast
get up and make the bed
call your father to talk about your mother
and its here that you have become the hollow of anticipation
stored in my chest cavity
burrowed into my life

hollow.

hollow out this space of use
take away the objects of display
the piano feels empty
white notes to distinguish black
but nothing squeezes between flats and sharps
so vivid memories fit into childhood recollections
hollow out your adolescence
something began there
ruptured and subtracted
to fit into a form
hollowing out the divide that created you different
a little odd and totally absurd at times
but all you
all soul
hollow out your days that turn slated
jaded and worn
ragged and ruff
they turn you out into the coldness
the hollow of your life
you were never made half whole
all of you becoming
constantly deserving

port clinton.

you call me
from the insides of port clinton
locked down
between walls
barred steel
wired webs
voice quivered
they do this to break you
low
remind you of where your two feet stand
and the perimeter they will solely walk
their days to
but these are not
their days
give them nothing
they will never carry you circular motion
one foot in-front of
the next
time goes by
in four year intervals
last time I saw you
me
driving cross country
thru cleveland
don’t go back there
when they let you out
don’t go back there
people die in the homes they grew up in
we ‘grew up’
but growing old is not the same
you and me
we'll never die
there
in those homes
i woulnt let us dissolve
like that
burnt ash
we spent our days
groom creek
cabin style
wood burning stove
at war with freezing air
outside
heading north on montezuma
towards sundance place
drink our fill of beefeaters and
tonic
that was life
in a moment
you don’t know how to tell me
on this collection call
what worlds your two feet walked
we sit on telephone wires
a man echoing in
silhouettes of time
to let me know
where exactly you are
i don’t trust your story
but i trust you

break the verb.

i am making moves that have turned my bones into years
with all this solidity ive taken weight strong enough to pull a river down
it wasnt how it was the night before the rain
it came down steady and strong
and that was after the clouds
we part our ways
down towards the middles of our life lines
and say goodbye
because its better then not saying you were right
and id agree
but only if you stay with me
because staying never brought you closer to your thoughts
of love and life and ties that unbind before your eyes
it was the way she said it that wrote itself down on paper
inked and remembered
because life is simple and smart and pure
and you had to come back
with all your hollow tears pretending
all to bend the water
break the verb
to become the noun that ive held up against
the place of a person
but you were the thing
and you woulnt remember this way of knowing by morning
extraction has become a method for means

"hello girl"

it didnt help to stop the commentary
the second guess of a good hand
handed down in generational habit
the stomach exceeds tension
a breath drops to a shallow gaze
and you are pivotal in these lines
lined up against the odds of fated outcome
the coffee didnt hold to the heat
the morning effected the light
and then you were going
i know all about it
straighten out the right and wrong
but not right now
it must have been the color of the day
quick hold to moments intertwined in lifes sentence
does the beginning always know the end
illusions ive become
hard pressed for ideas that keep me yearning
wake up to a man you do not know
and ask again what you have found here
in the silence of lips and lust and lacked love
become someone better
walk central down to where the park breaks
past a home you never found comfort in
after lies you told yourself at night
"hello girl"
did you remember in the city of fog that it is june
one year older then the last time you thought about it

pull.

the stronger downward pull
towards inevitable mistake
a breath lengthens
heady in the lungs
couldn’t see through thickness here
if only the water would break the damn
a storm gravitate south
the body conceal the tear
but the skin sweats beneath the sun
a river pulls downward
love empties the heart
a breath becomes betrayal
hard to grasp in the chest
nights dream of something other then lived
i listen to my own advice
forget to calm and come to it
like a child weans from a mother
i wean from the desert
a cold night
im not in my body today
im nowhere near it
brushed up against matter
revenge is the seeker
hungrily mistaken
distraught in memory
city walls to bind believers
believe me
the heart knows reason reason knows nothing of
he said
shutter your eyes
the light bleeds through onto paper
onto pen
but i will not write for you
for the world
or myself most of all

earth and sky & city traffic.

it was the rivet of a man
the obsolete that kept him meaningless
the burden without a drawback to hold to
towards fate and the mystic
between the barrier of time below anything of noon
she waited on him
holding space for the turning point of return
but he never returned
to her
like he did that morning

it was a silouette of time
a lapse in believing
she wore her sweater like ripples of a sea
deep blue
deeper than her eyes
she could withstand the taunting gaze
retreat and memorize her lines
as kernels of hope squared around her
she couldnt write like before
she couldnt squeeze him into the spaces that defined her heart
couldnt even find the break where he now ceased to exist inside
she mazed together places and pieces of fiction on truth memory
do you discover sense before scent is accumulated
into earth and sky and city traffic
commute with me down this long corridor
promise me, she said, promise me you woulnt end me like this
it was all premonition
pre dated
pre planned
pre organized business of affairs
containing the lengths lovers will lie down next to
and trace their way back to where they came
because we forget and forgive five pages long
 too long
a headache is a burden on my night stand 
because now is not like before
before was something different then it was

and this she said with confidence



wallpaper fall.

wallpaper fall
you'll be wound
singing raw bone blues
a portrait
who moved and couldn't be found later
paranoia season
traced back along the word lines
me editing
books on the sill
we used to wander
mysterious haired
reposeful hands
transforming milk into wine
water color illuminations
wise eyed for wry conversation
honest at the kitchen table
focus'd on the clothesline raindrops
this is it
wash the negative
palatable cleansing
swimming between tear soaked lips

(captions of Ginsberg intertwined)